Black Friday Memories

Well, they had us. The wife and I looked at the ads in the local paper and we were caught in the dark net called Black Friday!

Yes, the alarm went off at 4 in the AM so that we could make our consumerism trek to the temples of commercialization. I'm a bit embarrassed to tell you that not only did we go shopping at 5 Am, but we went to the black heart of Black Friday. Yes, that's right, we were heading towards... Waaaaal-Mart!

The closest Waaaaal-Mart is in the next town, 30 minutes south of here. You must forgive me for my naiveté. Because heading there I imagined a small conglomerate of people waiting for the man in blue vestment to open the door to Waaaaal-Mart—to let a small, but happy group of holiday shoppers to walk quickly, and freely through the isle while we filled our list of Christmas Ho Ho Ho. After all, how many crazy people like us are out there that would make it to a 5 AM opening of Waaaal-Mart?

Wrooong!! Imagine our surprise to learn that there are HUNDREDS of dummies just like us who would venture out in the ungodly hour of 5 AM. No lie. Imagine a parking lot, maybe 150 yards long, with a line of people, about 4 or 5 wide, standing there in the dark, waiting for the temple priests and priestess to open the doors of the price-reduction temple. Hundreds of people, all there to lay our offerings of the cash and credit cards on the registers altars of debt.

On top of all that, imagine the eerie sound that greeted us when, after one finally does find a parking space, we hear the sound of the rattle hundreds of shopping cart rattling in from all directions while people lay claim to their own little plastic mesh mules—beast of Christmas burdens they were to become.

Surprisingly, the line moved quickly. Apparently Waaaal-Mart was prepared to swallow the entire crowd whole. I'm guessing that the Fire Marshall didn't get a sales flier. Because, if he had, he surely would have been there too. And surely (stop calling me "Shirley") would have shut down the entire operation—having witnessed the massive holiday migration.

Before we even got to the doors there were several people carting out huge television sets. Unbelievable!! Obviously we were in competition with some real operators here. Slick shoppers that lot was.

Into the darkest part of the belly of the beast we went. Yes, right again... We headed straight for the electronics department! May God bless the two souls who piloted the riot that was happening there. We were shoulder to shoulder, cart to cart with dozens of others—each of us hoping, almost praying, that perhaps a remnant of our targeted Christmas cheer had somehow survived the onslaught.

The spirit of Sam Walton smiled upon us because each and every item was located and secured. Thank you Sam. Another bit of fortune that smiled upon us was the fact that the wife and I carried less than 10 items to the checkout, because the the Express Check Out line was significantly shorter than the rest. Our wait there was totally non-insane. Thank you again Sam.

We loaded up our booty and off into the dark towards home we went. At that point my wife pulled up another sales flier and said... "There's a six hour sale at Fred Meyers."

The above doodle is a Copy & Share If You Dare—an inspiration from my holiday shopping experience.

Merry Christmas to all!!

In other news: Previously I shared my appreciation for a young British artist Andrea Joseph. Recently she set up an Esty Shop to sell prints of one of her works for the first time. I like her work so much that for the first time I made a purchase of some else's art.

With her permission I am posting a copy of her art here. Andrea's main medium of choice is the common ballpoint pen. I'm always amazed at what she is able to accomplish with pen in hand. One of the unique aspects of this print is that the pen in the middle is actually drawn in, not printed, on the paper.

Thanks Andrea. I love it.

Sometime I must try and set up an Esty Shop for myself. Be sure to check my blog around the first part of January. I'll be giving away a few prints plus some unfortunate blogger will be chosen to have me lampoon their face with a their own personal caricature.